Okay, so here’s the deal: Newcastle United hating Guardian hack Louise Taylor is in love with Sunderland boss Roy Keane. You don’t believe me. See below.

Each little love note has appeared in the press and has been typed by her own fair fingers.

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Louise loves Roy. But does Roy love Louise?

(Roy is) immaculately turned out but never flashy (link here)

(Roy is) generous to a fault towards those within his inner circle (link here)

Keane is simply refreshingly honest. (link here)

(Roy’s) Touchline style (is) glowering, prowling, brooding, jaw-clenching - but always immaculately turned out (link here)

Sunderland’s manager (Roy Keane) - fast proving almost as snappy a dresser as the Portuguese (refers to Jose Mourinho) (link here)

One of Roy Keane’s most attractive qualities is his honesty (link here)

Sunderland’s eloquent manager (Roy Keane) (link here)

his (Roy Keane’s) invariably cliche- and platitude-free musings are always worth hearing and delivered in flowing, eloquent sentences that never seem to descend into grammatical black holes. (link here)

Not the type to rely on notes or props, Sunderland’s manager (Roy Keane)invariably ad libs his team talks. By all accounts they are frequently transfixing and sometimes quirky but the Irishman’s speech during Saturday’s interval was his most powerful yet. “The gaffer was as passionate as I’ve ever seen him,” said Kieran Richardson, a one-time Manchester United team-mate of Keane’s. “He gave us a history lesson at half-time. He’s a great manager.” (link here)

Roy Keane remains full of surprises but it is hardly startling to learn that Sunderland’s manager regards himself as “a dylanologist”. A bit like Bob Dylan himself, Keane can be seen as enigmatic and self-mythologising but one thing the former Manchester United captain most certainly is not is conceited. (link here)