Torchwood: Retractable Thumbs

Torchwood is a kind of diffusion TV show for people who find Doctor Who too authentic, involving some sort of undead robot space monsters on motorbikes theme. Of interest to us, on the other hand, is this warped faux ensemble. What is it with hands?

Thanks to Marietta! Original is here!

Oi.com: Army Girl

Most Photoshoppers have strategies to draw attention away from problem areas. For example, if I was retouching this I would have added huge flames to the mom's hair, so as to distract attention from her daughter's bizarre and unfeasibly long arms.

Thanks to Marcos! Original is here (possibly)!

PhotoHouse USA: Chapectomy

In a breathless deconstruction of the trite family self-portrait, USA PhotoHouse deftly excises the phallocentric father figure, leaving a single hand to signify - with profound semiotic irony - the hidden hand of capitalism. The camera is bereft of any screen or viewfinder in a de facto refutation of the omnipresent panopticon of male gaze, while the child points aimlessly out of the savaged image in a cathartic denunciation of the testosterone-poisoned concept of understanding directions. Marvellous.

Thanks to L!

Jimmy Bond: Artistic License To Kill

Mosht people would shay that Timothy Dalton wash never a clashic Bond. Better perhapsh than Lazshenby, but I have to shay he never desherved thish. It looksh ash though he'sh just shat on shomething shticky or shomething. And look at hish bird! She'sh got no bloody legsh!

Thanksh to JG! Original ish here!

Hong Kong: Amazing New Camera Phone

Of course to be complete, this image would include the ad's photographer, Thomas (who took this photograph and sent it in) and someone photographing him. (It makes sense if you don't think about it.)

Whitney: I Don't Know Her So Well

In the heartbreaking competition to be the saddest aspect of this whole thing, the imbecilic idea that female vocalists should always look like supermodels slightly edges out the profoundly tragic likelihood that Whitney believes this is a plausible representation of herself. In third place: the body's real owner probably has this in her portfolio.

Edit: Yes, it's a hoax.

Thanks to Jake! More discussion here.

Anane: Thighly Unusual

This brings back fond memories of being nine years old and not really knowing what went on where under women's skirts. So the moral of the story is, don't hire a nine-year old to retouch your sexy portrait.

Thanks to Jeff! Original is here.

Sony Style: Homo Simpson Walks Among Us

I like to think that in the original image she was flipping the bird at the people behind her.

Thanks to Limezor!